Triggers. They’re everywhere right? A song, a word, a certain phrase. They’re unavoidable. You could be having a great day, the sun is shinning, no traffic on your way to work, and you have your favourite meal deal combo for lunch. Then someone makes an ill-mannered joke and your whole vibe changes. Its not their fault right? Is it your fault? Psychiatrists and counsellors alike would tell you and work hard to get you to tell yourself that of course it isn’t your fault, you did nothing wrong. So why do you feel as if you’ve just been kicked in the stomach? Or you feel your throat closing up as if someone still has their hands wrapped around it. You find yourself clearing your throat and focusing so hard on breathing to stop yourself from crying. The moment passes but its still in your head, still on your mind. That memory or feeling that you worked hard to suppress, now poking its ugly little head again, and all you’re thinking about is how hard you worked to suppress it in the first place, and now all it’s taken is 10 seconds to bring it back again. One thing you should remember is;

It’s ok. It’s ok to feel like that. It’s ok to have a little cry if you need to. You’re not weak or defenceless.

People will always make jokes, they’ll always tell that story they think is funny but makes everyone else in the room squirm. These people are the lucky ones who have never had to experience life they way you or I may have. They’ve never had to deal with those traumas or life changing events, because if they did, they would know better. But these people are also the weaker ones. You and I, we’re stronger because of these experiences, and they’ve shaped us to be who we are today. We’ve been to rock bottom, and it might have been the worst time of our lives but the fact that you’re reading this means you got up. You might be there right now, you might’ve been there for a while, and I know it’ll take some time for you to feel like you again. But you will. You’re not hopeless, though you have been broken and feel like your innocence has been stolen. But you’ll start to see colours again, and every day the world will look just that little bit brighter.

Coping mechanisms are important. They’re what’s going to help you when you get that overwhelming feeling of anxiety or panic. Maybe it’s talking to someone you trust, or someone that has a calming effect, maybe its focusing your mind on something in particular. Writing in a journal can be extremely beneficial, so can colouring. Focusing your mind on an easy task, something that maybe brought you a lot of joy during your childhood because it’s so satisfying and carefree. Find your own little way and stick to it, you’ll soon find an easier way of doing it and find it helps every time.

Unfortunately we cant stop people making jokes. We cant stop an image or a scene from a tv programme, we cant stop someone else’s conversation you might overhear. But we can learn to cope with the consequence it brings. We can learn to face it and take it in our stride, and we can absolutely learn to stand up for what’s right when someone does make that squirmy joke. Always remember there is never a need to do any of it on your own. Keep you head and spirits high, and remember, even Superwoman sometimes needed Catwoman to give her a helping hand.